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Tantric Love: Journey into Sexual and Spiritual Ecstasy, Ma Ananda Sarita & Swami Anand Geho.

ISBN 1 85675 147 3, Gaia Books Ltd

Available from their website. Site also has workshop info and the like.

I was recently at a talk that Sarita and Geho gave at the Findhorn Community in Scotland during the Sex and Spirit conference there. I was very impressed by them and decided to review their book.

In both presentation and content this is a beautiful and sumptuous book. The essential nature of Tantra is expressed in an approachable and balanced way and the photos and graphics are very tasteful. The whole book is very artfully designed. The authors use the words Lingam and Yoni to refer to the male and female sexual organs respectively, and this also lends a certain charm to the book.

Tantra is Meditation

While reading this book it occurred to me that I had made the all-to-easy assumption that Tantra was about sex. However, the material made me realise that I had got it wrong. Tantra is really about meditation. It is about using meditation to allow a natural transformation of our sexual aliveness into spiritual aliveness.

"The word 'Tantra' is Sanskrit... It means 'the way', but also... 'methods of going beyond'...'transformation'...and...'transformation of poison into nectar'..."
We may be tempted to associate spirituality with otherworldly states to the extent of disassociating with earthly existence (well, I am anyway). However, a tree must put its roots down deeper in order to spread its branches higher and wider. If we reach too far without extending our own rooted-ness then we too risk toppling over. In Tantra there is no need to disassociate from our present reality. In particular it is important to have a healthy connection with our sexuality.

"It is possible to enter the Tantric path from wherever you are right now. If you are angry, you can use your anger as a meditation. If you are full of passion you can use that too... If you bring acceptance and consciousness to what you experience it will automatically be transformed into its divine aspect."
Breaking Free

One of the things that keeps us invested in our isolated sense of self are our inner wounds. We may be locked into the illusion that our wounds are unique and that this makes us, somehow, different. We may be tempted to believe that our dreams and aspirations are also unique and that they somehow make us different too. However, somewhere inside us we know that neither of these beliefs are true and that deep within everyone is a sense of loss, or of something missing, and also a common yearning for unity. It is that tendency to hang on to that small sense of self, based on an illusory specialness, that stops us discovering our inner nature and our true, and unbounded, uniqueness.

"...many people live and die without ever experiencing the right conditions to let go of their protective shell and begin the journey towards the light... Love and sex are considered dangerous by teachers of many meditative approaches, as they are afraid the seeker will lose the thread of awareness. They are afraid of the animal in us and hope to bypass it. Their philosophies are based on fear, which cannot lead to freedom but only to protection."
Of course, the very things we try to repress come back to haunt us in a gross and distorted form either individually or collectively.

"We can see the results of repressive ideologies...perceiving sex as sin creates a climate in which pornography, prostitution and child abuse flourish."
However, Tantra does not seek to replace one set of beliefs with another set of beliefs that would also eventually become limiting and constraining.

"...It is important to understand that Tantra does not offer any beliefs or philosophy: is simply proposes methods of meditation. It is up to each individual to experiment with these methods and discover their own truth."
Tantra offers us a way out of the morass and moral quandary of conflicting motives and drives.

"By bringing meditative awareness combined with love to the sex act, we enter the most profound exploration possible for us on this planet... Sex leads to birth and whatever is born has to die. Within sex are all the secrets of life and death unveiled by entering sex with meditative, loving awareness."
Chakras

Most of the chapters are dedicated to a particular 'chakra'. A while ago, when I first heard the term 'chakras' I couldn't help wondering what they were and where I could get some. 'Perhaps they are some kind of vegetable. I'll have a look in the supermarket.', I thought. However, I was mistaken.

"These are energetic centres within the body...that communicate with particular organs in the physical body. The chakras represent the dynamic flow of cosmic energy within the human body".

Each of the chapters, that focuses on a chakra, offers insights into the nature of that chakra. It also offers methods and techniques for the chakra's awakening. I tend to be a bit wary of anything that focuses on stimulating chakras directly particularly through breathing exercises. I am particularly wary of anything that attempts to directly stimulate 'kundalini' (the energy 'serpent' said to be located at the base of the spine). There seems to be too many of us Westerners assuming that we can get some kind of quick 'high' by tinkering around with our chakras. There is always a risk of stimulating the unbalanced and unintegrated parts of ourselves into even greater unbalance and then having to try and handle very distorted impulses and drives. I am very glad to note that Sarita and Geho mostly offer a very gentle approach and, as far as I can tell, manage to avoid any kind of unbalanced tinkering that might cause people to damage themselves.

With any such techniques it is always wise to be cautious and gentle with ourselves, particularly in the beginning. If I am the type of person who is not in the habit of having a good connection with my feelings (which is sometimes true) then I will not tend to hear any warning bells that I may be going too far, or too fast, with a particular exercise. It could find myself in a risky situation if I do not take my time and make a point of taking things slowly till I have a better connection with my inner processes. If you decide to try the techniques in the book I recommend erring on the side of caution and skip anything that does not seem right to you, even if you don't know why it seems that way. Once you are surer of your feelings, and of your own process, you will then know the best pace for you. I am sure that the authors countenance common sense and individual responsibility.

However, having countenanced caution, I must say that the exercises in the book are not practised for overly long periods and are mostly focussed on love in one way or another. A sage once said that the most natural way to stimulate the chakras and awaken kundalini is to practise loving. This opens the heart chakra, which acts as a magnet to all the other chakras and opens them in a harmonious sequence. (Some even go as far as to say that if we practise loving the soul itself directly intervenes in our awakening and greatly assists the process). This approach seems an intrinsic part of what Sarita and Geho offer us. Perhaps that is what makes them such impressive embodiments of their approach.

Tantra for Singles

Many of the exercises are, of course, for couples. However, singles can practise Tantra too! The essence of Tantra is the freeing up of our energy in relation to all life, so there are a number of exercises that we can do on our own. Here is one of the simpler ones:

"The observer is the observed

Step One (5 minutes)

Sitting comfortably in front of a mirror gaze at your own face fixedly and with great concentration. Try not to blink. Notice how you feel and what kind of thoughts arise. After 5 minutes cover your eyes with the palms of your hands, resting them.

Step Two (5 minutes)

Rest you eyes on the mirror, but this time, allow the face in the mirror to look into you. Your are not looking, but simply receiving the look from the eyes in the mirror. Relax and allow yourself to be looked into. Note your thoughts. After 5 minutes cover your eyes with the palms of your hands to rest them and again note your thoughts. Notice how they differ from your thoughts in the first step.

People often feel judgements of themselves arising in the first step. Whereas in the second they feel more soft and loving. This is because the first step uses the left, or Yang side of the brain, and the second step the right, or Yin, side of the brain. "
Reclaim Your Balls

There are many other exercises including one called Reclaim Your Balls that helps men to regain their power. There are also various ones to help women feel more connected to their sexual essence too. Some sexual problems are dealt with such as; premature ejaculation, guilt about sex, performance fears as the like. There is also some coverage of sexual issues such as masturbation, foreplay, afterplay and menstruation. There are suggestions on which exercises are suited to which problems or issues.

From the books perspective, our soul mate is the person we are willing to meet with at the soul level, by moving beyond our personal issues and projections. Many of the exercises are based on letting go of defensiveness and the need to perform in sex and to endeavour to meet our partner in a truly loving way. There are massages, meditations, breathing exercises and guided imagery sessions to help couples open to each other in more intimately.

The Great Law of Magic

To give you a sense of the breadth of Tantra I would like to mention one of my favourite parts of the book. The section is called The Great Law of Magic. It based on the old adage that 'energy follows thought', or in the words of Osho (Sarita and Geho's teacher), 'Live the result and the cause will follow'.

"Think of your desire and write it down. Close your eyes and visualize your inner state of being were you to get this desire. Write this down too. Your meditation is to live the result of having attained your desire.

A woman came to use, disappointed in her relationships... We taught her The Great Law of Magic, asking her 'If you found the right man what would be the result within yourself'. She responded, 'I would be glowing and alive with joy'. This became her meditation. Three months later she had a new problem. 'I have so many men chasing me I don't know how to choose between them!'"
One of the interesting aspects of this technique is that is frees us from feeling that something outside us has to change before we can allow ourselves to experience the type of lives we want. We don't have to wait for the right person to come along, the right job, the right car, or whatever before our lives can be filled with love and joy. Instead we can cultivate the feelings around what it will be like to have our needs met and life will automatically unfold in the direction that meets those needs.

Tantric Freedom

Tantra offers us a way to go beyond both repression and obsession around sex and to find the inner meaning of our sexual energy. Tantra sees sex not as and end in itself, but as a pathway to a greater connection with wholeness and with the cosmos. In a way, sex is a reminder of our connection with the cosmos and that we are not limited to the isolated and separated sense of self that had tended to dominate too much of our lives. Our ability to experience orgasm is a reflection of our ability to experience joy in our lives, and the bliss of our connection with the cosmos.

Anyone wanting to experience Tantra, whether single or in a couple, can gain a lot from this book. It offers much depth and insight within a well-balanced approach to exploring sexual and spiritual ecstasy. Tantra sees the human body as a symbol of the cosmos made by God. Meditation on symbols has long been a way to reach beyond the form to understand their hidden meaning. Tantra, therefore, endeavours to help us understand the symbology behind our body, and its energy, so as to obtain a deeper connection with its meaning and with God the creator.